What movies did you watch or buy this week? (8-26)

I haven't had much time the last few weeks, so just a few.

Braven
Novemeber Criminals
Dark Crimes
American Gothic (Blu-ray)

Also ordered Leonor on Blu-ray. That's a blind buy, but the director is Luis Bunuel and Ornella Muti is in it.

Is April Fool's Day (1986) a Slasher Film?

Troma and I discussed this recently.

Considering the ending of this movie, is it a slasher film? What about Return to Horror High (1987)?

The Curious Case of Amityville


There have been so many great haunted house horrors through the years, and The Amityville Horror is the quintessential movie of its kind. Haunted house movies can be extremely creepy and atmospheric when done right, the tension builds and builds, they grab you and don't let you go. They can also be a hell of a lot of fun. The Amityville Horror has all this in abundance. What makes it even the more intriguing is the fact that it is supposedly based on real events.

Now I have read everything there is to read about what happened in Amityville, Long Island, New York. I do believe that some real shit did happen in that house. The DeFeo's moved in. Ronald DeFeo Jr killed six members of his family. They were found by police in their beds, lying on their stomachs. It's estimated that the whole thing took a mere 15 minutes from start to finish. The police determined that the rifle hadn't been fitted with a silencer, so the gunshots should hypothetically have woken the DeFeos up; however, there was no sign of a struggle. He was tried and convicted for the 1974 killings of his father, mother, two brothers, and two sisters.


The Lutzes moved in next. George and Kathy Lutz married in July 1975 and each had their own homes, but they wanted to start fresh with a new property. Much of the DeFeo family's furniture was still in the house. They lived in the house for less than a month. George Lutz was one evil son of a bitch. He practised the black arts and drove whatever entities were in the house to begin with - haywire. Daniel Lutz (his step-son) claimed he witnessed George practicing telekinesis in the garage one day, and that he has a ton of books on "sacrificing virgins".



Some weird shit went on in that house. That boy you see in the photo - he wasn't there when that photo was taken. A priest was blessing the house when he heard a masculine voice demand that he "get out." The house was plagued by swarms of flies despite the winter weather. Kathy had vivid nightmares about the murders. The Lutzes' 5-year-old daughter, Missy, developed an imaginary friend named "Jodie," a demonic pig-like creature with glowing red eyes. George and Kathy saw the image of a demon with half his head blown out. It was burned into the soot in the back of the fireplace. George saw Kathy transform into an old woman of 90: "the hair wild a shocking white, the face a mass of wrinkles and ugly lines, and saliva dripping from the toothless mouth." Ed and Lorraine Warren visited the house. They were among the very first to investigate the Lutz's claims, corroborating the evil presence in the house with their expertise in demonology and clairvoyance.

Anyway, it is one of my favorite haunted house horrors, up there with Don't Go to Sleep (1982), Ghosthouse (1988), Burnt Offerings (1976), The Shining (1980), The Woman in Black (1989), The Innocents (1961), House of Lost Souls (1989) and others.

Walking Toilet Bowl (1990)

I'm not made squeamish very easily. When it comes to watching anything on a tv/computer screen, it almost never phases me. But it does happen. Most recently when I watched a scat porno called Walking Toilet Bowl. It was pretty much what I expected. But I didn't expect it to be so... I don't know. fucked up, I guess. Anyway. I have officially been phased.

I'm not a huge fan of porn of any kind, but intrigued by all that is extreme and/or fucked up. But this shit is officially too much. So, Jamie Gillis (of Water Power fame) has put out a number scat fetish porno flicks which seem to put an emphasis on the degredation of women. This particular woman was given the luxury of having a drink before enduring the atrocities which lie before her. And I can say with all honesty that she needed it. The look on Carol's face from the very beginning is proof of that.

Mr. Gillis starts off by whipping this woman's ass and pussy as a warm up. He then convinces his lady friend to get off the motel room bed and come over to him and get on her hands and knees and lick his shoes. The bottom of his shoes, which he claims has dog shit on them. I assume he's not kidding. Carol seems to be pretty miserable right off the bat, doing a poor job of acting enthused. She lays on the floor and touches herself while Mr. Gillis hocks loogies on her and in her mouth all the while berating her for being a toilet bowel. Carol is not pleased by this. Nor is she pleased when he starts punching her in the ass and slapping her in the face. Yet, she still seems very hungry for balls. Her hunger would not last.

And finally, Mr. Gillis takes a big fat shit all over Carol's chest. which is actually when this shit finally starts getting good. She lays on the floor, crying while he stands over her and masturbates, ordering her to do stuff with his shit. Such as rub it all over herself, On her crotch, in her vagina, and yes. In her mouth. She actually managed to suck down a turd or two. As miserable as this poor woman seemed, there is a point where she apparently snaps and starts laughing hysterically at what was going on. The laughter would not last, however.

She would then be forced to suck on poopy-dildo, and rub shit all over her teeth and use what was left as lipstick. She's informed that she's allowed to throw up if she needs to, but miraculously never does. Even the inevitable salad tossing wasn't enough to make her toss her cookies. Kinda dissappointing, yet, equally impressive. All I know is, This chick must have needed the (crack) money really, really bad! This is true bottom the of the barrel porn. For men who hate women and love shit only! 1/10



#Extreme #Porn #Review

Asia Argento in the news

Ho....ly.... crap. How embarrassing. I seriously don't mean this is in a political way at all, I just feel bad for her. I've had a crush on her, off and on, for ages, as many people here also have. But... she blew it! What a nightmare.

Megalomania: The History of Summer Camp Nightmare



I never went to summer Camp. I just wasn't the type of kid that would have enjoyed it. Yet, looking back, I kind of wish I had been. All these 80's summer Camp Slashers make it all look pretty cool. Minus the obvious, of course. But there's just something about Summer Camp Horror, isn't there? Yeah, it's great. However, there will be no Horror talk, today. Plenty of Summer Camp talk, though. Today, I'm going to talk about a film with one of the most misleading titles in all of cinema. Summer Camp Nightmare was disqualified from the Horror genre a long time ago, regardless of what section I originally rented it from. Yep, it was right there between Slumber Party Massacre III and Terror Train, just waiting to be rented by an unsuspecting Slasher fan. So, yeah. Not a Horror movie. Not at all. It turned out to be more of a summer Camp Thriller. With that said, I can't say I was the least bit disappointed.

Now, we come awfully close to Horror in this story, but ultimately, things never get quite dangerous enough. Summer Camp Nightmare is about one guy's thirst for power and his manipulation of everyone elses thirst for a reasonably fun summer. Let me start from the beginning: Some pushy, religious fanatic (Chuck Connors) has taken over as camp director, practically making this once fun place a "Christian Camp". Not that there's anything wrong with Christian Camps, but if that's closer to what this guy had in mind, a heads up would have been appreciated. Of course, I don't know how that would have gone. Maybe everyone would have headed to Camp Arawak instead, but the point is, Mr. Warren needs to back off because nobody signed up for this shit.

In the fall, Franklin Reilly will be headed to Millitary school, but for now, he's merely a counselor at Camp North Pines. Franklin looks forward to having some fun, getting some fresh air, looking after the younger campers, studying everyone and learning their weaknesses. Franklin isn't like everyone else. He seems like he is, but what Franklin is really after is a little complicated. Franklin wants to take over. Actually, let me rephrase that: Franklin is taking over!

After establishing himself while getting as many people on his side as possible, Franklin makes little remarks about Mr. Warren's rules, riling everyone up. Then, he oh so cleverly convinces them that Mr. Warren molested one of the younger kids. This ensures that no one will side with the Jesus freak once the revolution gets started. Oh, and by the way. There is going to be a Revolution at Camp North Pines. With a gun in hand, Franklin locks up all authority figures while promising his regime in the making that the cops will be called within a day or two ... or three. We'll see how it goes. So, with no (adult) authority figures around, why not do some hardcore, PG-13 partying in the meantime?

Well, Franklin is not fucking around, obviously, because he has already had the authority figures, over at the nearby girls Camp, locked up, as well. And yes, at gunpoint. The girls are, of course, invited over, officially beginning summer for the older kids. Camp North Pines quickly becomes one, big, chaotic party, but chaos is fine with Franklin as long as it's on his watch. Now might be a good time for someone to point out that everyone has pretty much traded one authority figure for another. And the new one seems to be one order away from becoming a cult leader. What's scary is that this is all coming together way too easily for him Things don't get too out of hand until Mr. Warren is accidentally killed, which is kept from everyone. Franklin isn't about to let anything or anybody come in the way of his control over this Camp, and anyone suspected of disloyalty will be dealt with.

A bit of a Lord Of The Flies ripoff, isn't it? Not too much, but some elements are borrowed but used wisely. Most notably, everyone's tendency to forget that there are laws outside their new society. Both stories show what isolation can do to a person's mind, but it just doesn't work as well here, because these kids are only about a week or two into their stay. Summer Camp Nightmare has all the makins for a fantastic 80's slasher, but without those Horror elements, ends up being far more story-heavy. There was one intentional murder but it was done off screen and was more or less deserved, so, this movie can never be accused of being anything more than a hard Thriller. The character of Franklin was an interesting one. We never really get to know him or how he ended up that way, but that boy must have had some damn fine parents to end up with such issues. Something tells me Franklin had a session or two with a shrink ahead of him, though. Kids like that need to be fixed before being allowed to enter society. We certainly have more than our share of sociopaths out there as it is. As for Summer Camp Nightmare, any fan of 80's Camp Slashers should be able to easily cut it some slack once it gets going. Personally, I am proud to have this misplaced Thriller in my Horror collection, whether it belongs there or not. 7/10



#Review

Maximum Overdrive Coming to Blu-ray in the US (Finally!)

This was actually a rumor last week after an image appeared of a purported featurette for the Blu-ray, but now it's official https://dailydead.com/stephen-kings-maximum-overdrive-is-coming-to-blu-ray-from-vestron-video/. On October 23rd, Maximum Overdrive will be released as part of Lionsgate's Vestron Video series. For the first time, the movie will include some extras besides the trailer.

- Interview with Producer Martha DeLaurentiis
- Interview with Special Make-Up Effects Creator Dean Gates
- On-Set Vintage Interviews with Stephen King, Emilio Estevez, and Laura Harrington
- Behind-The-Scenes Footage
- Theatrical Trailer
- TV Spots
- Still Gallery

Strangely, not listed is the featurette I mentioned before, which was supposed to be something with John Short and Yeardley Smith. Hopefully they just don't want to mention it yet for some reason because it sounds like hardly anyone connected to the movie is involved with this release. And none of the footage that was removed to appease the MPAA? That's disappointing. Stills of that footage have popped up over the years, so it definitely existed at some point.

Don't get me wrong though. As a huge fan of Maximum Overdrive, I'm glad this is happening. I own a few of those Vestron Video Blu-rays and they're nice. Lionsgate has come a long way since the days of their 4:3, almost bare bones DVDs. Remember those? I'm still convinced they were using VHS as their source.

Sheriff Alan Pangborn

Anybody watching Hulu's "Castle Rock"? It's a decent show, set in the Stephen King universe. Is there a name for his universe? The King-iverse?

So I've watched about half of this series, and Scott Glenn plays the character Alan Pangborn. Now, I've been hearing that name in the show, but I hadn't put the pieces together until now. Alan Pangborn is a recurring character in Stephen King's stories, and he'd even been in a few movies, too!

Back in 1993, the character of Alan Pangborn was in not one, but TWO movies. Needful Things, played by Ed Harris, and then The Dark Half, played by Michael Rooker. Normally, I'd get pretty mad at recasting, but all of these are solid actors, so I'm okay with it.

Just think it's pretty cool, is all... Anybody read the books?

The horrors of The Wizard of Oz

I've always liked how this movie is family-friendly, but it still has some horror elements to it. You've got the wicked witch, setting the standards for all witch cliches for years to come, and then you have flying monkeys and tornados, and a bunch of mini-perverts.

I was reading up on some behind the scenes problems with this movie, and apparently, the munchkins (ages 40+) were all gambling and drinking on set, as well as molesting young Judy Garland (age 16). 🥴 I wonder if Hans from 'Freaks' was one of those munchkins that partook in that behavior. If people think you're really young for your whole life, would it get confusing to you? Would you then feel alright groping young girls?

On set of that movie, Dorothy was also drugged to keep her regular for the movie, and a few people were hospitalized. Original tin-man actor got aluminum dust poisoning, the wicked witch actress was burned by the trapdoor-flame thing, among the most notable mentions.

However, contrary to previous thoughts, no munchkin hung himself in the background. Later debunked to be just a bird. A goddamn bird! I can imagine how weird that would be before high-def could prove otherwise. Watching your favorite family musical, only to notice a dead body swinging in the background?! I almost wish it was true. 😦


I've never seen "Return to Oz", but people have stated that the movie has some frightening elements to it. Family horror. What a concept, huh?

Shot-On-Shiteo: To Protect And Serve



Anyone ever wonder what it's like to be a Cop? It sounds great, doesn't it? You basically get to do whatever you want. You can hurt anyone you want and get away with it, and you get all the free stuff you want where ever you go. Including drugs. You tell someone to give you something, and they have to. You're a cop! However, only the fittest, toughest, most honorable individuals are cut out for this line of work. That's why Tim Ritter looked to his guy, THE guy, the legendary Joel D. Wynkoop, to play the role of a Police Officer in his 1999 Found Footage-Mock/Shockumentary, Dirty Cop No Donut. If anyone can play a Police Officer, convincingly, it's this guy!

So, Gus Kimble is a pretty irritable guy. Gus is bothered by nothing more than people who disregard the law. I'd imagine that's why he ended up becoming a Police Officer. Gus isn't without flaw, though. He has a bit of a temper, and perhaps enjoys a few perks under the table. Alright, I'll just say it. Gus Kimble does whatever he wants, whenever he wants, to whomever he wants. and if you don't like it, he doesn't really give a fuck, because he has a badge and you don't! Tonight, Gus is doing something a little differently. Something he wouldn't usually do, but he really wants to show the world what it takes to be a good cop. Tonight, Gus will be accompanied by a camera man who probably has his own plans for whatever footage he acquires, but that's neither here nor there. Tonight, Gus is going to tell a story, and he's going to have fun doing it.

First, the coke! Find a coke dealer and steal his coke. Then, we'll have lots of coke. That's pretty much how this whole thing begins. Gus busts in on some dealer he knows, one thing leads to another, and I'm pretty sure that guy is dead, now. So, he won't be needing that big bag od coke. Gus just loves to hear himself talk, and as you can imagine, this is only becoming more and more the case. I'm thinking Gus mostly wanted to show off for his camera man friend, because once they head into the convenience store, Gus made himself completely at home, eating, drinking whatever he wanted, rudely blowing off any and all displeasure expressed by the clerk. Gus needs a little down time before heading out to the pawn shop, where he accuses the guy of selling stolen merchandise. The coked-out Gus destroys a bunch of shit after flat-out refusing a bribe. So, Gus plays by the rules. He's just super selective about it.

After doing some coke with a hooker, then harassing a bum and sticking him in the trunk of his car, Gus heads over to some guy's house, who he claims is a pedophile. I don't know if Gus hates Pedophiles THAT much, or if he just thinks it's funny to force someone to castrate themselves while pissing on them. Well, that's what happened, regardless. Gus held a gun to his head until the wiener was detached. And then, big Gus cut a big, juicy fart for good measure. True story.

What a night this is turning out to be! And it's not over. Gus does some more coke and pulls over a drunk driver, only to get himself so worked up, he ends up destroying the woman's car. All of this done as self-righteously as possible. After raiding a party and getting ready to make some arrests, some underage girls catches Gus' eye, which might be our first clue that this Cop is a little on the "sketchy" side. Hell, is this guy even a cop at all, or just some fat asshole on coke who wants to control everybody? I'm starting to wonder.

I've always loved the films of Tim Ritter, as well as the Wynkoop brand of acting, but this film is by far my favorite project from them both. In fact, ever since I saw Dirty Cop No Donut for the first time, I automatically laugh whenever I see Wynkoop in anything, now. He was truly amazing in this, just reeking of every sleazy cop stereotype you could think of. Constantly talking out his ass about doing the right thing while topping his own hypocrisy with every cocaine-fueled scene. A lazy, ignorant bully who has seemingly found the perfect outlet for whatever neurosis he may be suffering from.

Dirty Cop No Donut is unlike anything Tim Ritter has done before or since. Ritter's only non-Horror film, Dirty Cop is a darker, trashier take on the TV show, Cops, even going so far as to get authentic reactions from unsuspecting non-actors. And I should point out, this is one movie that actually benefits from being shot-on-video. I think we can all agree on that. Some years later, something resembling a sequel was made, giving us a peak into the life of Gus Kimble after a long stay in the nut house. Certain scenes from said sequel were, in a way, merged with the original movie before getting a really nice release by SRS cinema. This epic version of Dirty Cop No Donut is the only way one should experience it. I really hope this movie finds a bigger audience someday. Made some time between the dying days of the SOV and the rise of the reality show, Dirty Cop No Donut never stood a chance at gaining the cult status of a Killing Spree or a Truth Or Dare. However, those of us who stuck around were treated to one hell of an entertaining concept. For anyone who loved the Ritter films mentioned above, you owe it to yourself to keep on going. Let this one be your next Tim Ritter film, and laugh while Joel Wynkoop acts like an asshole! 8/10



#Review