When dancing... lost in techno space trance. Arms flailing, gawky gravity only brings you down. Then find you snagged on frowns, and so slowly dawns of time... you're jazzing to the bleep tone of a life support machine, that marks the steady fading of the star you call Sun. And when midget midnight sirens lead to blue-flash road-mash. Stretchers, covered heads, and slippy red macadam, and find you creeping 'neath the blankets, to snuggle close a mangle bird, hoping soon you too will be freezer drawered. Then welcome... mmm... ooh, chemotherapy wig, welcome, to the Trash Epics SciFi Fantasy challenge...Consistency is the name of the game in week 2•, with most players clocking up a similar score as last time and nobody moves up or down more than a place. Giftastic Onyx is still light years ahead of everyone, she will take some catching as time slips, turns, slides, warps n runs out. The equally giftacular Troma tightens his grip on second place, but has pressure from Ballz (hee) who is ploughing (hee) his way through some classic TV and foz making good use of his free Netflix trial to challenge for a podium, or at least hold off beatnik. There's a bit of a gap developing to the midfield, and even more further down as inevitably interest begins to wane.
current rank (last week's rank) week1/week2 = total
1.(1) Onyx - 4058 / 2664 = 6722
2.(2) Troma - 2220 / 1870 = 4090
3.(3) Ballz - 1791 / 1801 = 3592
4.(5) foz - 1338 / 1807 = 3145
5.(4) beatnik - 1722 / 1244 = 2966
6.(6) Box - 1282 / 1078 = 2360
https://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/dragons/images/8/81/Tiamat_%28Dungeons_%26_Dragons%29_%28main%29.png/revision/latest?cb=20100407181150
7.(8). Baphomet - 772 / 1296 = 2068
8.(7). Johan - 852 / 702 = 1554
9.(10). peeps - 675 / 650 = 1325
10.(9) india - 682 / 0 = 682
11.(11) Blood - 496 / 182 = 678
12.(12) zed -357 / 0 = 357
13.(13) Gym - 170 / 0 = 170
Numbers
0 - total (updated) views since last week for Gym, india & zed
1 - Rogue
2 - men enter, one man leaves
3 - people who watched 'What Happened to Monday' last Wednesday
IV - Phases
5 - Slaughterhouses
6 - amount of 'Oz' related viewings for Johan
7 - Blake
lots - number of cunts the Hound has yarped
12 - days of Christine
Number 13
41 - the 41st film Troma watched
42 - the meaning of life, the universe and everything
60 - episodes of Twilight Zone seen so far
69 - dude
83 - number of sequels, prequels and remakes viewed••
131 - years between the oldest n youngest films
1984 - Big Brother
2001 - A Space Odyssey
4 million - the year the sun turns human skin vermillion
•unlike earth weeks TESFF weeks are not restricted to a seven day cycle
••almost certainly innaccurate
Don't worry if you've seen more but not updated your progress post, they'll just get added to the next challenge update. Which I'm gonna try to make more interesting, meant to do this yesterday but ended up drinking all night so now i'm hungover and lack inspiration.
Bat Pussy begins seemingly in the middle of the movie, during an arguement between an ugly, and most likely drunk middle aged married couple. It's not entirely clear what they were babbling about due to sound issues and mumbling. But out of the blue, they take it to the bed and the ugly wife starts sucking the ugly husband's ugly, limp dick, which will remain limp for the entire duration of the film. Is he impotent? Was he THAT turned off by his 50 year old co-star ? Has he had too much to drink? Nobody knows. That's what I love about these types of movies. Nobody knows. But this is sort of a porno, so, he plays along and pretends to be hard, repeatedly uttering the phrase "Oh, God! That's what the picture in the magazine was!". I'm not entirely sure what he meant by that, but I'm pretty sure a crew member just burped.
These two go back and forth between berating eachother, kidding around and making sad attempts at getting each other off with their mouths, whilst spouting improvised horshsht like "Every time I ram my tongue up your pussy, it comes out your asshole! Now, what the fkn deal is that?". Meanwhile, a new character is added into the mix. Bat Pussy's super senses informs her about the shitty, old married couple trying to get it on, and she disapproves. "Nobody fucks around on Bat Pussy", she says, and she soon crashes their party, and almost immediately ends up in a head giving threesome, which I guess is suppoed to be the big payoff. so, we do get a dash of hotness near the end. Yet, that idiot's still as limp as ever. So, nobody ever actually gets fucked.
Most of the badness and pointless WTFness comes from the insanely stupid dialogue blurted out by ugly, drunk trash with unfortunate genitalia, and what may or may not be attempts at humor. And it seems like they're trying to throw in a story here and there, but they never really commit. And I can't really blame them. After all, this IS a retarded porno with one limp dick, a bickering married couple, a jealous Bat Woman ripoff, no script, and no plan. And no redeeming qualities. Highly recommended! 2/10
