#SororityBabes in the #SlimeBallBowlORama 2

A 2022 sequel that nobody asked for. This Full Moon stinker was directed by Brinke Stevens and features some of the original cast in green screened cameos, because this movie must have been shot in a week or less on a shoe-string budget.

This movie is only about an hour long, and they don't even get to the bowling alley until a half hour into it. The babes have to steal a bowling trophy and inadvertently free the dumb-ass imp/genie, who asks them for their wishes. This fucker is made out of rubber and the effects are terrible, even for Full Moon standards.

Honestly, I don't know anybody who genuinely enjoys these lazy-ass Full Moon movies. Charles Band made some okay stuff back in the day, but now the company settles on the worst, most uninspired crap they can muster.

I love Trancers and Dollman, but that's mostly because I love Tim Thomerson. I'm not really impressed with any other Full Moon movies that I see, and this certainly is no exception.

Deep Red screening, with Goblin!

We're going to see this on Halloween.

Claudio Simonetti's Goblin celebrates the 50th anniversary of Dario Argento's 1975 classic, Deep Red / Profondo Rosso by performing Goblin's iconic score to a special screening of the film followed by a short set of quintessential Goblin songs/scores set to clips of their cinematic counterparts.

#Insecticidal 2005

I've been wanting to see this movie for about 15 years ever since I saw that the lead chick has a huge rack.

A sorority is overcome by huge killer insects after a nerdy girl accidentally triggers some bio hack in their DNA. Don't think about it. It's killer bugs, but they also turn this one slut into a possessed psycho lady. Overall, the women in this movie are fine as hell, even if the movie itself is retarded. The CGI is abysmal, but the women make it watchable. Even the dudes in this movies are trying to jerk off to them.

I've certainly seen worse.

Can we all agree Weapons is the best horror movie of the year?

#HellHouseLLC: Lineage 2025

The new installment of the Shudder franchise came out on October 30th. It's different this time around, no longer a found footage movie, but a straight up movie movie.

It started out okay with the normal clown stuff, but as it went on, I got pretty bored and zoned the fuck out. I couldn't tell you what happened after about 30 minutes.

Expect a zillion more of these movies over the next couple decades, because they're cheap enough for Shudder to shit out, just like the V/H/S movies. It's a shame, because I thought the first one was really creepy. Now, these movies aren't special.

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Happy #Halloween!

I managed to shit out another Halloween teaser video for the Jamie Lloyd story I wrote years ago. I wish they would make another Danielle Harris entry, because to me, she is Halloween. Here's the viddie, with a blatant Halloween III flare to it:

#Scream7 trailer is out. The trailer is kind of meh, but I'll still watch the movie.

@markus-san, why didn't you like the new I Know What You Did Last Summer? Too many young dumb teeny types in it for you?

#HouseOfTheDead
Part 1 (2003) & Part 2 (2005)

These movies aren't deserving of two posts. Based on a video game series, these two essential equate to Syfy channel movies, so you should already be asking yourself why they even exist.

The first is directed by Uwe Boll. Yikes. A group of college-age tools head to an island for a rave on a ship operated by Captain Kirk (Jurgen Prochnow) and his useless doomsayer shipmate Clint Howard. he doesn't want to take them there because he knows a lot of stupid shit is going to happen on that island, but money talks. When they get there, they're quick to notice that no other party-goers are there, but there are some zombies!

Once they realize they're in over their heads, Jordan Casper (Ellie Cornell) shows up to shoot some zombies and then a bunch of cliché things happen. Then, we get some mad scientist type of plot about an undead dude to seeks immortality and we get a lot of cheesy action. Cheesy in a bad Syfy channel way. At some point, this movie does end, and that's a good thing. There are a few hotties in the beginning though, but the movie basically gets worse and quite generic once the zombies get involved, which is sad.

Enter the second movie. It begins in a college with Ross Patterson trying to haze some pledges. Jennifer Holland from Peacemaker is there for a couple minutes, too, as is Theo Rossi, both in completely useless roles. Sid Haig appears for a couple minutes, too, doing some mad science on a female student before succumbing to the zombie infection himself. Ellie Cornell returns Jordan Casper for a cameo role, despite having died in the previous movie.

Once the outbreak begins, some military types head in to clean up the mess, and again, the movie gets worse once the zombies get involved. The future talent is reduced to useless roles, and the established talent is also wasted in insignificant roles. Get the big names in for 5 seconds, then subject your audience to some genuine horse shit.